Breaking News

Head Line: Latest Killer on the Loose: SMJK Phor Tay's Geography Folio killed 45 students in a single night

Ok, the kill thing is too far, but it’s making them INSANE! The student’s parents tried to convince their child to visit a therapy. Some of them even end up living with a psychiatrist, unable to move even an inch because they are wrapped with tapes.

Ok, I’m joking, they’re not wrapped. Wait a minute, this is supposed to be a newspaper, and papers don’t joke around. Ok, serious now. The headmaster of SMJK Phor Tay wouldn’t answer any questions because he thinks its ridicules.

According to Tang Ching Yee, a student from 1A2, known as Jordan by her pals, Bitch-face by her sister, can’t stop ranting about the folio. This is what she said to the media

“I know I’ve killed a lot of things. Like my vacuum cleaner and several of insects. I understand if I receive punishments. But this is beyond what I expect! I donate money to old folks and orphans. I don’t deserve this! Why? Why? WHY?”

We interviewed the Sarah-Dessen-addicted – Nicole too.

“Stupid Geography is ruining my love life, that's why I'm going to grow old with cats.” (More at nicole0508.blogspot.com) and then she started laughing and talking about “I don’t care, I don’t care…”

Wow, this sounds fun: I don’t care! You don’t care! We don’t care! They don’t care! I don’t care, I don’t care, and I just don’t care! I never did! (Jordan: Hey, that’s my line!)

Fun’s over, or my boss will fire me. We want to know what the process of “making” the folio is, but all the pupils keep shouting. We tried to force out the story by feeding Jordan chocolates. Finally, it worked. (“Hey boss, I want a raise!” I glance over the dozens of empty chocolate boxes). This is what she said:

“It took a lot of searching, copying, pasting, backspacing and resources to make the easy-looking, hard-making, stupid-sounding, sucks-smelling and awful-felling bitchy-tive Geography folio.” She shouted the lyrics of “I Don’t Care” from FOB until her lungs burst out.

Great, this job is making me insane too. I need to go home, get some coffee. Or I’ll try climbing on to the roof like her. I hate my job; the singing is giving me a headache. (I vomited on someone and went straight back home.)

XOXO