C-Hottie In Town

List Of Misery

1. The whole school knows I, the junior loser has a crush on Senior Hottie, C. Biggest humiliation of my life.

After C graduated, I built up my life, I swore to heaven:

I AM NEVER GOING TO SEE HIM AGAIN.

I started high school, started a new life, I got over him, slapping every person that mentioned his name.

After a few weeks, the list goes on.....

2. I saw a ghost across the school gate. I tried not to remember his name. I stood there looking like an idiot, trying to figure out the whole C-hottie thing. Ok, I just saw him once what could possibly go wrong?

After a few weeks I see him too. And I am 100% okay with it. I don't think he recongnizes me, with my hair cropped short. It's ok...

But sadly, the list goes on.....

3. OMG! My ex-crush turns out to be-----my NEIGHBOUR??!!

Friday, morning--I sat at the threshold wearing my shoes. I was ready to go to my previous school to receive my scholarship. RM50 for 6A's, 50% off if I get 6A's.

And this is how it happened...Hottie in hot sports-wear with a hot walk and hot freaking breezing-hairwalked past my door. Next door neighbourglanced up and asked C:

"Hi, I thought you should at school right now."

"I'm in the afternoon session." answers C.

"Where do you live?"

"Oh, just in front, I just moved here," C flashed his hypnotizing smile at her.

Okay, I must be dreaming. This is a nightmare. He's not real.

Unfortunately, when I went to school, the above statement isn't true.

C-hottie is back. He's in my neighbourhood. I'm not going out for the rest of my life. I have to change my name! Um, Megan Tang...Hazel Tang...

No, make it Megan de Scanio.

4. C-Hottie wakes up every morning at 8am for a morning jog.

I just want to die. Happily.

XOXO

JorDan T

The Ugly Truth

Spotted : Senior girl,V dating junior boy,T .

Love is selfish, just like New Moon, a love triangle is made between V, T and V's BFF. V found out her BFF had a secret crush on T. and V got "a little too" dramatic. But V and T moved along, not showing regard to V's BFF. Poor thing, but does she had anything to do with the next story?

V and T's got called to the office after Ms.F caught V and T holding hands. Before going into the teacher's office, T held V's hand, again. V's father saw it and slaps T. They say love cures everything, looks like love haven't meet V's father yet.

V was 'so' under depression and confusion. One lovely afternoon, she went into the bathroom and try to commit suicide by strangling herself. Wonder if her heart's got tangled? Luckily the weapon knows life is precious, instead of dying, V fainted. That's how V (almost) lost a life to a junior so heartless. Move along V...

At the end, V got transferred to another school, full of bitches, to start a new life. Without T.




The truth is always ugly,
XOXO
JorDan T.

Gah, Yolk Getting Married. To Human

I half-ran to the classroom and blurted out the news, shouting to the Anti-Yolk club committee. "(Violent words I prefer not to repeat or rethink or remember)," catching every breath when I said that.

(The committee's reactions are in bold)

Opening and closing their mouth like a goldfish.

“That’s right.”

One took off her glasses.

“Yup, you heard me, she’s getting married.”

Almost got stroke, high-blood pressure and hernia.

“To human. Human, I repeat, human.”

speechless…

“Can you actually believe it? Some human, actually wants yolk. Can you imagine her walking down the aisle, wearing a wedding gown – yellow, La Quire’s design, kissing somebody after she says ‘I do’.”

Shivering and raising goose bumps, somebody ran into the bathroom.

Our most loyal member, Sue, aka Idiot/Idiot Sue finally said something after the stroke.

“Perhaps to an egg white?”

That broke the silence. Everyone burst into laughter.

“Yolk and Egg White? They make a perfect couple.”

“No, they make a perfect omelet”

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA… …!!!”

The joke lasted until after school.

“Jordan, Yolk’s getting married… haha,” Vien said that before she stepped into her car.

For a second, I knew she wasn’t kidding. Yolk is getting married. The engagement ring on her middle finger said so. I wonder who’s the unlucky man? I mean, look at her:

The man must be an imposter. Well, I’ll tell you what did the man looks like when I heard more news.

XOXO

The Shortest Post

I always want my post to be as short as possible, but I couldn't just stop making the sentence longer. That's why I got B in the summary part in exam. And at last, after millions of practicing, I manage to post the shortest post in the world - the post before this, entitled "Justin Bieber". Scroll down for more info.

Click this to erase the question marks in your head

Justin Bieber - One Time

He's just 15 years old. Can you believe it? Talented he is! He's gonna be the future Jesse McCartney. But I have to admit, the first time I heard this song, it was on the radio. And I thought it was a girl who sing this. Sorry, Justin!

XOXO

Justin Bieber

Rocks!!!

XOXO

The Invention of Hottness

This post is meant for the girls. Boys, be careful, cause the next thing you know might be dumped by your girl.

I’d like to thank god that god has created a lot of hotties. And so, it’s because of these hotties that make the girls scream at the first sight of them.

Admit it; their unbelievable gorgeousness is practically the thing that makes the world go round.

Temptation is automatically formed when you see this picture.


Just like video games, this is the one and only reason you fail your test. You cant take your eyes off him.

I know I have no more than 6% of fighting chance, but aren’t them just something to look at? Apparently all the girls agree with me.

Well, back to reality. XOXO

Yolk, you go to hell

The teacher finally found a chance to humiliate me and make me feel guilty in front of everyone. Well, technically she didn’t because her plan didn’t work at it backfired back to herself.

As a quick introduction, I hate my Chinese teacher, Yolk. We (the anti-yolk club) call her that because she keeps wearing the same outfit – a yellow hideous outfit. She hates us as we hate her too (huh?). We want her out of our life and go screw herself. Plus, she grows a mustache which I realize it’s getting worse (darker, more obvious) when she called me up to the front to challenge her.

You see, I made a sour face when I saw that poisonous bitch approaching to our class when she’s not supposing to. There’s this fixed procedure called “Yolk comes in, your good day ruined.” Why would the original teacher left us stuck with that douche?

“Do whatever you like,” she said to us. Sue came to my place to accept free tutoring on Math. And then it happened. “Sue, what are you doing?” Oh great, can’t I even have a life? I told her “Sue’s weak at Math, I have to tutor her” in a loud than usual voice – just in case she got problems with her ears too.

Yolk took her chance. “Jordan, that is very impolite of you! Came up front,” she flipped a fifthly book and pointed at something.

Great, she want to talk law, if she expect a happily deduction, she don’t know Jordan Tang Ching Yee. “I got the right to deduct your marks you know.” She used her signature sign – trying to incriminate you by staring at you deeply with her piercing eyes, the devil she is. BUT! I’m stronger! I let her stare at me. Either she got tired of waiting or she realizes that her trick doesn’t work on her or whatever it is; she said “What should you do?”

“Sorry, teacher” there is no such sorry in my voice. I went back to my seat. After she was gone, my Anti-yolk club got bigger.

I haven’t missed the words “whatever you like” though. Luckily I got such great friends; they stick me up when I got bullied by a jerky slut. I feel better now, we even wrote a song about her. We even joked about her mustache, suspecting her as a transsexual. Long live, Anti-yolk club! Curse you yolk! Curse you won’t be respected but treated like egg yolks when you got old. And you’ll die with regret!

So here I am, ranting on yolk. I’m gonna treat this bowl like yolk and kick her ass. 1.62 seconds later:

P.S. Learned a valuable lesson here: Never infuriate your teacher when she’s the one who marks your exam.

XOXO